Stream of conciousness

Readings are hard. Especially when they're boring, hard to understand, and the topic is of no interest to you. But you have to do it. Otherwise you don't pass the class and you fail your degree. Maybe. To be honest, I'm unclear on that. If I don't do the reading, I'll still get the summary from a classmate tomorrow in the seminar, but my understanding will be less, surely. Who knows.

One thing I do know is that I'm ill and I want to sleep. Which I have been doing most of this weekend. And I'm almost recovered, but I have a full week ahead of me. So will it knock me back down? Who knows.

Do I even know anything? It is currently 11:51pm on a Sunday night and I am sitting here in my towel still, having gotten out of the shower an hour and a half ago, and instead of doing some boring reading I am writing this post. Maybe I need this post to help clear my head. Maybe I'm just procrastinating and don't want to admit it. Maybe I'm just stupid and can't do anything, therefore cannot understand the reading, therefore am writing this. Seriously, who knows.

No one knows anything that's going to happen though, really? I envy people that do. Or rather, that feel so sure of themselves that they aren't worried about the outcome. I wish I was that person. Will I ever be? Who knows. Who knows. Who knows.

I've given up for tonight. That I know. And I will start again tomorrow when I do know what tomorrow is like.

What will become of tomorrow?

​Who knows.